Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Even Good Comes from Sickness

Will the sun every come out again?! It has been overcast and rainy here since we were in Mexico for the wedding and it's starting to depress us. We haven't had sunshine in a long time,

Quinn is still sick. Because Jason and I are so new at this parenting ordeal, we kind of freaked this weekend and made a doctor's appointment for her yesterday morning. She started showing symptoms of a cold on Saturday morning. They progressed to the point on Sunday that she was getting a fever, her eyes were crusted over, her nose was runny and stuffing her up and she had a cough. I think I called my sister 2 or 3 times for advice. At the fever's peak she reached 103.9 degrees. Sadly, with a cold, there isn't much you can do. But I played the crusted eyes card on the nurse to get us an appointment. This was when I thought she had backed up sinuses in her eyes.....

Turns out, it's pinkeye. Gross. Why did this not occur to me? I guess because I've never actually seen pinkeye. Apparently though, it can happen when your poor baby girl is rubbing her face and transfers the snot from her nose to her eyes. Hello infection! So good thing I took her in, right?! Now we have antibiotics for it. Not only do I suction out her dry nose, squirt saline solution up her tender nostrils and wipe her raw face clean with a cloth, I can also hold her uncooperative eyes open while dropping liquid into them. The kid hates me right now. She thinks I'm the devil.

That's why this afternoon meant so much to me. Quinn has been crying a lot since Saturday. That and just making miserable sounds (whining, wimpering, etc..). She hasn't smiled much either. That's what really gets me. She always smiles. This afternoon she was unconsolable too. She was fussy and weakly crying. She kept grabbing my hair and pulling when I held her (like I deserved to feel the pain she was in). My mind started wandering.... what is wrong with her?! She has a cold, sure the pinkeye must be somewhat uncomfortable, but why is she suddenly wimpering so much? I rushed to the computer with her in my arms, her head on my shoulder, while I started googling 'ear infection symptoms'. And then it happened, she quit wimpering.

I looked down at her and realized she had fallen asleep in my arms. My shoulder was already starting to get damp from her drooling and snotty nose. She was weezing through the congestion, her little fists grabbed onto my shirt. I hugged her so tightly and just layed my head on hers.

Let me just say that Quinn is not a cuddlebug. She likes attention and she needs to know that she has your support, she even loves to be held, but she doesn't want to cuddle. To have that little girl even lay her head on my shoulder is precious; to have her fall asleep in my arms was unbelievable.

I stopped googling 'ear infection symptoms' and walked to the couch. I turned on the tv and just sat down for an hour and a half and held her tight to me. I could hear her and feel her little breath the whole time and I sincerely hope that I never forget those moments. She doesn't need that kind of affection often and I'm so blessed I was able to comfort her.


Cheryl said...

There comes many times in your life that you just want your mommy. I've been there, you've been there, and Quinny is there. The important thing is that when that time comes--mommy's there.

I love you,

maggie said...

i'm so sad to hear that quinn is not feeling well. i hope that she feels better soon. you are right, there is nothing like holding your baby and giving them the comfort that they need.

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately children will always be sick, involved in accidents, etc. While modern medicine is important, nothing will ever replace the love and nirturing a parent can provide. Fortunately, Quinn has two of the best.


Angie said...

That was such a precious moment to share. I got goosebumps and teary eyed reading it knowing she just needed Moms love and comfort.